Sandee*

PHEW! Take a break here.

Recent workload is madness. I restricted myself from opening MSN to increase the attention span on work for almost one month already. Guess I did not only benefit myself but also benefited my JMs, I ASSUME.

As such, my mood swung very often. Sighh. When I could not design anything solid for that day, that night I would look like charcoal and ready to burst into flames at anybody. While after I did something super solid or quite a substantial amount of work, I would cheer up and tease the people I have fumed on previous days,

"You know why my mood is so good now??? I have done very good work today and I think I deserve a pair of new shoes!"



Sigh. Someone said I'm a 'happy poor girl and a sad rich one'. People spend when they are feeling down but I am totally opposite.

Barely only a week has passed in May, I have spent 1k already. Before you scold me for contradicting my previous post, I am also spending to reward myself for saving up to this X amount I have targeted previously! Therefore, it is a cause for joy! HURRRRRRRRRRRRR nnpp!



People close enough to me would also know that I am SUPER strict with organizing my daily life stuffs. This is my good point because,

• I can be a good daughter who doesn't need her parents to worry,

• I can be a thoughtful girlfriend who plans for her boyfriend,

• I can be a good mother who plans for her children,

• I can be a good friend who thinks far for her friends (just an example to add on, not talking about you wahahaha),

• I can be a good employee who is sooo organized and meeting deadlines.



But, sad to say, this is also my worst point as,

• I have been a disrespectful daughter when I scolded my mother just because she put my panty into my sister's closet,

• I have been an unreasonable girlfriend when I blamed my boyfriend for the things that were planned so eagerly by me and NOT HIM. HMPF. I always bluff myself by thinking it's always the girl who plans for small things while the guy plans for big ones.

• I may become the most haggard mother when I get angry with my children every now and then I see the toy car out of the toy box which I have already kept 5 minutes ago and 10 minutes ago,

• I always control my weird nosy character very very hard when I see friends not planning good enough for themselves by telling myself it's really none of my business just let them die please.

• I feel like killing myself for being such an organized worker who always clear the recycle bin on my desktop or shift deleting some supposedly redundant file which finally proved to be the most important file in the world.



In short, I am just one straight line,
________________________

disciplined but not flexible,
safe but not exciting,
reserved but having super high potential of going crazy.


I was not like that when I was still studying! Do I call this maturity? No I don't think so.

I still scold at will.
CHILDISH!!!